The Ashes, the most wonderfully absurd and endlessly gripping rivalry in all of sports, returns this week. Over the next 50 days, England and Australia will lob insults, dispute etiquette, bring up old scores (like that whole colonialism thing), and posture like cultural superpowers. Somewhere amid the indignation and national chest-puffing, they’ll even play a little cricket. Actually, a lot of cricket. The Ashes is test cricket at its finest. Each match (or test) can last up to five days, and