Terror at the CDC. Photo: Elijah Nouvelage/Getty Images On August 3, Edward “Big Balls” Coristine , famed as the teenage mascot of Elon Musk ’s DOGE assault on the federal bureaucracy, got badly beaten up during an attempted carjacking in Washington, D.C. President Trump reacted with a wild and angry screed threatening to federalize the D.C. government. Then on August 11, Trump followed through with a wild and angry press conference in which he quite literally fabricated a violent-crime wave in