DEAR ABBY: My ex, “Hank,” and I have two sons together. Both are smart, kind, college-educated, hardworking and independent young adults. Hank is estranged from our younger son, “Andrew.” Andrew could never live up to his father’s expectations. This is one of the reasons I fell out of love with my husband. He would initiate a verbal confrontation with Andrew and say things like, “You are not my son.” Later, he’d clarify that he meant Andrew doesn’t act like his older brother does. Another